Introduction:
Confidence can be a tricky thing. While it can be developed through personal skills and accomplishments, if we link it too closely to external factors such as external validation (approval or recognition from others) and the ups and downs of life, it becomes less authentic and fragile. In other words, genuine confidence comes from within and is more important than skill itself.
While confidence isn't the main reason my clients come to me, it naturally becomes a large part of our work together because it's crucial for self-improvement and achieving goals.
What is confidence?
Confidence is complex and influenced by a variety of factors. At its essence, it involves believing in yourself and having self-assurance that comes from a deep-seated belief in your own abilities and qualities—a belief that you can successfully tackle and face day-to-day challenges.
When confidence is low, you might feel stuck and uncertain, lacking inspiration and unable to make the changes you truly desire.
Building and maintaining confidence involves understanding your character, values, and beliefs. It also means protecting your emotional and physical well-being from negative influences and situations that can undermine your self-esteem.
So, what causes low confidence?
I consider every angle when working with my clients using the Whole Person Approach. Although serotonin's role in confidence is often overlooked, it's important to note that this doesn't always relate to mental health issues. Serotonin levels can be impacted by our choices and external situations, gradually chipping away at our self-confidence.
Serotonin, often called “the confidence molecule”, plays a crucial role in our brain's complicated network of functions. Its impact extends beyond regulating mood, as it actively forms our emotional experiences and significantly contributes to our sense of self-assurance and well-being.
While serotonin doesn't directly create confidence, it has a slow effect on confidence over time. When our serotonin levels are balanced, we have a positive mood and outlook in life, which creates more space for self-assurance and optimism, increasing our confidence. This is the reciprocal connection between serotonin and confidence.
External stressors and factors such as chronic illness, pain, stress, anxiety, poor sleep, or an unhealthy diet can lead to lower serotonin levels. When serotonin levels decrease, our mood shifts, affecting our perspective, and if this becomes chronic, like working in a toxic work environment, it may have long-lasting effects on your confidence and overall well-being.
Boosting Confidence:
Building confidence isn't just about changing our brain chemistry; it's more about understanding what chips away at it. This involves taking a closer look at ourselves and our surroundings and addressing situations that can make us doubt ourselves. While this may seem straightforward, I find that when we become accustomed to our environments and the people in our lives, we often fail to see how they can negatively impact our self-belief.
I usually start by exploring clients’ surroundings—Where we work, who we're with, and how we are being treated collectively all affect how we see ourselves and play a big role in boosting or lowering our confidence.
Consider the people you spend time with and the places you go. Do they influence your self-perception and emotions? When we experience respect, appreciation, and validation, our brains release serotonin, enhancing our self-confidence. Our brains interpret these actions as signs of being liked and valued, which, in turn, makes us feel good and more self-assured.
The Impact of Disrespect:
On the other hand, when people disrespect or underestimate us, it leads to stress and anxiety, gradually undermining our confidence as we begin to doubt ourselves and our abilities. This is a dangerous and slow process. It’s only when we recognize it that we can begin to make the necessary changes to protect our confidence and mental health.
Practical Tips:
Let's look at some simple ways to naturally boost our serotonin levels and confidence in our daily lives. Remember, what works for one person may not work for another, so adapt these tips to your own preferences:
Learn about serotonin and how it affects your feelings. Knowing this can help you build confidence.
Take time to recognize your strengths and past achievements. It can make you feel more positive and self-assured.
Being around people who treat you well and support you; it can boost your confidence.
Stay active by walking, jogging, dancing, or doing activities you enjoy. Exercise helps you feel good about yourself.
Spend time outdoors, especially during the day, to boost your mood naturally.
Eat a balanced diet, including foods with tryptophan to help control serotonin levels. Consult a healthcare professional if making significant dietary changes.
If you're feeling low, consider talking to a therapist. They can provide guidance and strategies to help you feel more confident and improve your well-being.
Conclusion:
To nurture our confidence, it's important to protect and routinely evaluate it, including our relationships, self-perception, coping skills, and how challenging situations impact our thoughts, emotions, and overall well-being.
Confidence is complex and always changing. We can strengthen and improve it with effort and support, but we can also diminish it. It's not static, innate, or solely reliant on our skills. It requires self-care, fostering positive connections, ensuring that we are treated with respect, and maintaining healthy boundaries in our interactions and relationships while safeguarding our emotional strength and power.
Recognizing when to ask for help, especially during hard times, is so important. I personally understand how challenging it can be when we feel overwhelmed and doubt ourselves. But this is precisely when seeking support can prevent a gradual loss of confidence.
Each person's path is unique, and seeking support is a testament to one's inner strength. My hope is that exploring the connection between your serotonin levels, your environment, and your confidence has sparked your curiosity and encouraged you to dive deeper. Talking with a therapist is a valuable step toward nurturing your well-being and mental health. It's important to remember that while I can offer insights, I'm not a medical professional, and for matters related to mental health, seeking guidance from qualified experts is essential.
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